Contemporary Women’s List of Expectations

No roommates. Non-smokers. No flowers on the first date. Must be a social drinker. Must be adventurous. Must be humble. Must be spontaneous. Must be a planner. Must be self-centred—but not cocky. Cannot be too skinny. Must be fit. Cannot be intimidated by her. Must not be obsessed. Cannot be overly close to friends or family. Must love travelling. Cannot brag about travelling. Cannot be a party boy.  

Must be tall, handsome.

Strong, educated, ambitious—with a good job, a house, a car, and the ability to blend seamlessly with her family.
And he must be a good kisser, a good lover, and a great father to future children.

And so, many men conclude that women are not interested in sex. But they are. Their expectations are simply higher. This is what we call the 80/20 principle: a man must bring added value. In the past, almost everyone married. Economic dependence made the “good provider” a predictor of marriageability. Today, that guarantee no longer exists. Women are not looking merely for providers; they seek soulmates—emotional connection, stability, and respect. Biology plays its part. Men produce millions of sperm daily; women can conceive only a limited number of times in a lifetime. It is natural, then, that women seek partners who can be both fathers and protectors—otherwise they risk raising a child alone. Women now cheat as frequently as men, often with fewer consequences, because they are better at secrecy. The female sex drive operates more in the mind; the male sex drive is more somatic. When a man is aroused, he feels it immediately. When a woman is aroused, she must interpret emotional and intuitive signals—her body does not announce desire as directly.